Purple Haze
The dichotomy of life
This month has been a bit of a roller coaster. On the one hand, there was a lot to celebrate. Family visited for the 4th and we got to experience the fireworks in our new neighborhood for the first time — an over-the-top 40-minute display. I visited my family in North Carolina and brought back a haul of peaches and mushrooms. I negotiated more work with my favorite instructional-design client. I was even on TV (more on that in a future piece).
But there have been hard bits, too. Bird declined rapidly early in the month, and we’re still working hard to get her back up to par — and not sure that’s even possible. (Also, fuck kidney disease.) My hormones are apparently having a months-long going-away party before my hysterectomy in October — my face broke out like a teenager as I battled massive cravings for salt and chocolate, my energy levels waxing and waning erratically. Mercury in retrograde made me feel a loss of control, resulting in me picking a huge fight with my husband.
In other words, July has been very … Lifey. Good and bad, up and down. Lots and lots of unresolveds and unknowns. So it’s appropriate that I did my purple pages now. Purple has always been a dichotomous color for me. Empowering, yet calming. Soothing, yet inspiring. Peaceful, yet teeming with potential.
Purple makes sense as the color of queens and kings — the ones who shoulder the heaviest of burdens while simultaneously basking in the ultimate of comforts.
Heavy is the head, I suppose.
✨ If you’re here, reading this footnote, I’m ever so grateful. ✨
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You are not alone. Totally understand the struggle.
Fuck kidney disease! I lost my Gracie to it in March.
I hope Bird finds a stabilizing place and you both get more quality time together.
I have been overindulging in sugar and salt as well. AND TOTALLY understand the reality of picking fights with my partner. I hate when I do that.
And poor Anderson’s ears. :/
Thinking of you and hope you feel some peace in the future.
Fuck kidney disease! I’ve seen too many other cats go that way. Paws crossed for Bird. It’s the quality of life that matters, and it seems like you give her that.